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Weekend Trip + Gratitude

I touched briefly on my bouts with depression awhile ago and I got an overwhelming response from you guys.  So many messages poured in with people dealing with similar issues.  Depression and anxiety is something that I’ve struggled with most of my life and it’s something that goes beyond “feeling a little down, sometimes.”  It’s something that is so extremely intrusive and bleeds into every nook and cranny of life that sometimes, you feel suffocated.  The experience varies depending on the person but for me, my rational mind realizes how irrational it is but feeling it is a somewhat of a different monster (and not of the cute Squishy variety either).  Simultaneously, I often times find myself being angry (if that’s even the right word) that I can feel this way when I logically and rationally know that I am so blessed to be alive and well.  They say that God works in mysterious ways.  Yesterday was another one of those rough days.  As I lay tossing and turning in bed, baby brother calls me (we’re 3 hours ahead here).  I didn’t mention anything about my day and somehow, the phone call morphed into a 3 hour conversation.  We discussed blessings of all things.  How Blessed are we to have the love and affection of our loved ones?  How Blessed are we that we’re able bodied, that yes, we’re in the Great Recession but we have food on the table and heat on cold nights but sometimes we get so wrapped up in ourselves that we stress out about the trivial matters of HOA or bill discrepancies when there are little children that don’t have enough food or natural disasters that devastate entire nations?  We cried, we laughed (or rather, I cried a lot and Daniel told me lots of jokes to make me LOL).  Again, it’s bittersweet bc that was probably one of the last few times I’ll be able to talk to him (at least for that long) since he’ll be leaving for the Netherlands very soon…but perhaps, this is a Blessing in disguise as well!! =D

I spent the weekend in Atlanta visiting with my Uncle.

Pretty lights hung in his Foyer.

Lunch: Cod Fritters, Pan Fried Dumplings, Spinach Side Dish, California Rolls, Mapo Tofu, Tangsooyook (Fried/Battered Nuggets in slightly Sweet & Thick Sauce–it’s on my list of videos to do), Spicy Squid Salad with Squid, Cucumber, Carrots, Daikon, Jalapenos, and Kimchi (of course)! =D

Entrance to the Korean Bakery–yum!!


Oh geez, this makes me want to go back just for this!

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Gorgeous Cream Sponge Cakes studded with Fat Berries (what I really wanted to get–but somehow, I just couldn’t justify eating an entire cake by myself, lol).

What I ended up getting.  The package reads “Green Bean Bread” but all of the ingredients for whatever Pastry you buy are as follows: Flour, Sugar, Eggs, Vitamins/Minerals.  I addressed this from my last visit to a Chinese Bake Shop and called their bluff as well.  There’s just no way that those are the only ingredients that happen to go into every single Pastry so I choose to ignore this and tear away greedily at my soft yeasty bun enveloping fluffy sweetened cream.  omg.  could my mouth water anymore right now?  I am also very fond of the Honey Castilla/Cheese Cakes at Korean Bakeries too.  They’re so light and billowy with a somehow creamy mouth feel.  The best thing about Korean Pastries are that they’re super tender, never too tooth achingly sweet and almost always have a surprise tucked right in the middle.  In Korea, I remember walking up and down hilly rural pavement to walk to the local Bakery to purchase a freshly baked loaf of White Bread–still warm that it steamed the package it came in.  Soooo buttery soft and delicious is this loaf that it can be eaten naked and still rank higher than most Western breads (imho).  Smeared with thick Peanut Butter or drizzled with Honey and it’s unstoppable!  I hope that y’all can try it one day–soon (especially if you’re lucky enough to live near an actual Korean Bakery and eat one fresh and not pre-frozen as most come in mass Asian Markets/Chains).

Pillowy Pastries + Mounds of Gratitude

Love Always,

Your Squishy Monster ^.^

p.s, here’s my latest video!


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